Welcome back to I wonder Wednesday! Some peculiar thoughts and events surrounding my thoughts this week. I’ll start with why in the heck spiders have to be a part of our echo system. I’m sure I’m not alone when I say I can’t stand them eight legged freaks!
Two nights ago I was on the porch with a friend chatting as she came to pick up her baby. Suddenly she says “don’t back up!”. And the tone of her voice was right in sync with some horror movie. Low and behold a giant wolf spider was perched on the screen door behind me.
Just a few days earlier his buddy had met his match with my girlfriends flip flop in the basement while we were painting. I cannot express how strongly I loath spiders. It’s really like a hate hate relationship. I hate them because they creep me out and they hate me because I shrill and start throwing and swinging things around.
*Opening the screen door oh so carefully*
Me: Honey get out here and bring a shoe!
Me: There’s an eight legged mammal on the porch! Hurry!
Hubby: Yeah that’s a big one.
Hubby swats at it with his shoe and the spider drops and runs under the lip of the front door stoop. I’m breathing heavy with nostrils flaring.
Me: Don’t you dare leave it there! It will get into the basement and if it see’s Jared it might try to retaliate!
Hubby: Who is Jared?
Me: Oh he’s the spider Tammy beat to death with her flip flop.
Hubby: You named it.
Me: Well no, technically Tammy named him.
Hubby: I’ll be right back.
Me: How in the hell do those things get so big?
My friend: They eat small children.
Me: Run for your life Vincent! (He’s the baby)
Hubby comes back with some butane and a lighter.
Hubby: This will get him.
Hubby sets the torch a blaze and the spider takes off across the porch like a bat outta hell…
Me: Get him, get him!
Hubby: I’m trying, he’s a fast little effer!
Me: Don’t let him get away!
As the spider nears the edge of the porch and ultimately jumps to his freedom in the bushes…
Me: You let him escape!
Hubby: That’s right. Tell your friends mofo!
After some research on these nasty little buggers I found this… The highlighted section cracked brought a smile to my face.
Venom toxicity - the bite of the Wolf Spider is poisonous but not lethal. Although non-aggressive, they bite freely if provoked and should be considered dangerous to humans. The bite may be very painful. First aid and medical attention should be sought as soon as possible, particularly as to children or the elderly.
Spider Identification - an adult is 1/2 inch to more than 1 inch in body length - mottled gray to brown in color, with a distinct Union Jack impression on its back. The female carries it's young on its back.
Habitat - this spider is a ground dweller, with a burrow retreat. It has a roving nocturnal lifestyle to hunt their prey and can move very rapidly when disturbed. Commonly found around the home, in garden areas with a silk lined burrow, sometimes with a lid or covered by leaf litter or grass woven with silk as a little fence around the rim of the burrow.